RICHNESS and HAPPINESS
"Little money gives lots of sweet little pleasures
Big money gives loads of big bitter problems.”
--- T. Rama Prasad
What is richness ? According to Swami Vivekananda, “richness is not earning more, spending more or saving more; richness is when you need no more.”
Once, somebody asked Bhagwan Buddha: “I want happiness. What should I do ?” Buddha smiled and said: “It is very simple. ‘I’stands for ‘ego’ – give it up. ‘want’ stands for ‘desire’ – give it up. Then, what remains in your ‘I want happiness’ is pure ‘happiness’!”
Happiness is the most undefined feeling in this world. What is rubbish for one may well be a ruby for someone else. Spontaneous happiness is fast disappearing from this world. We have to create happiness. That is why it is aptly said: “The happiest person doesn’t have the best of everything in life. He is only just good in making the best of everything that life brings along his way.”
Everyone who is HAPPY is RICH. So, the ones living on the road in the cartoon below are RICH.
Sigmund Freud, the famous psychoanalyst, said: "The most challenging thing is to bring satisfaction to humankind as they might even doubt happiness."
March 2022:
For the fifth year (2022), FINLAND was anointed the HAPPIEST COUNTRY in the World Happiness Report 2022ranking. Denmark came a distant second, and was followed by Iceland, Switzerland and the Netherlands. Afghanistan was the unhappiest country in the world and India didn't fare particularly well ranking 136 out of 150 countries, well behind its neighbours Pakistan (121), Bangladesh (94) and Sri Lanka (127). 126 out of 136 in 2023. The levels of happiness were arrived at after assessing factors such as GDP, life expectancy, freedom to make life choices, and generosity. The report was published by the UN Sustainable Development Solutions Network.
“These illustrations suggest four general maxims[...].
The first is: remember that your motives are not always as altruistic as they seem to yourself.
The second is: don't over-estimate your own merits.
The third is: don't expect others to take as much interest in you as you do yourself.
And the fourth is: don't imagine that most people give enough thought to you to have any special desire to persecute you.”
― Bertrand Russell, The Conquest of Happiness
Poverty is a relative thing. Many could not go to a school due to poverty. For the same reason I could not pursue high level academic studies. In fact, for certain compelling circumstances, I had to be scrimping to the extent of one meal a day, on many days, during the period of my post-graduate studies. At the other end of the spectrum, there are some college students who felt poor, and lamented about inadequate financial support (less than Rs.20,000 per month !) by the parents though they are provided with a car, a house and a cook exclusively for each of them during their study period ! Yes, poverty is a relative thing.
Fortunately (for my better half !), I am not an epicure with tastes for dainty delicacies. Not being fastidious about food, I thankfully eat, even today, whatever is available without complaining -- hot or cold; spicy or bland; less salt or more salt; a bit undercooked or overcooked. I feel bad when food is wasted in hotels, ‘receptions’, ‘kalyanamandapams’ and even at our home, but – you guessed right – there is nothing much I can do to prevent the gratuitous waste. Do you know that every year 1.3 billion tonnes of food is wasted ? The first in the table manners to be taught to children must be: “Never waste food, think of the world’s starving children.”
I am acutely aware that if I have some food to eat, some clothes to wear, and some shelter to sleep, I am richer than 75% of the people on this planet. A third of the world’s 820 million chronically hungry people live in India. Just think about the homeless children who are surviving by scavenging leftover food from Rajdhani Express or Leela Palace Hotel. Less fortunate children scavenge from smaller hotels, kalyanamandapams and garbage bins.
GOOD OLD ‘POVERTY'
We lived for a long time in the Sanatorium quarters which was not at all fit for a decent living, with no furniture worth calling by that term and lived on a salary of a Medical Officer of about Rs.600/- per month (a sum considered princely by me at that point of time – 1960s !). The life was simple, good, plain and peaceful sans pretensions and ambition to become rich. “Lots of little pleasures, lovely little garden, beautiful flowers, abundant leisure, plain life -- definitely more peace and happiness in those good old days than in these modern days of affluence and hypocrisy,” asserts my better half. She used to cook for the family, look after the child and home, and attend full time teaching work at a college. She owns and wears minimum jewellery. I never bought her a jewel. In fact, I sold her small gold chain to buy a radiogram (radio cum gramophone – read about it under the heading “OUR LOVE STORY and good old days” on this blog) even before our marriage ! There was less hypocrisy, less ‘make believe’ drama, less disappointment, more fulfilment, more contentment, more leisure and more happiness in those days. Life was not at a frenetic pace. Little events. Little things. It is the little things that matter in life. Life is short. Take joy in the little things that are always there around you ... don't waste a big chunk of your lifetime in building up big assets which anyway you can't enjoy as you won't be left with enough lifetime to enjoy them -- as life is short. LITTLE things -- they are alluring, amazing, mystical and bold. Grab them.
MONEY POWER
Many believe that they can buy anything including happiness. They are obsessed with amassing "black wealth" for buying anything. This culture has set in as it is happening -- some unscrupulous elements got away scot-free even after doing heinous crimes, and many got many things done out of the way through the route of corruption and bribery. This sort of richness doesn't command real respect and ensure real happiness. Of course, it may earn a lot of "pseudo-respect" from the materialistic society which just vanishes when the money power is gone.
PSYCHOLOGICAL FACTORS
No doubt, some money is needed to meet the basic needs to live a comfortable life. But many think that lots of money brings lots of joy and happiness. To be fair to those who think that money generates happiness, I may cite the study of Andrew Oswald and Jonathan Gardener of the British University of Warwick. They found that the level of happiness increased when a person comes across a large sum of money. Years later (2008), the same professor, Andrew Oswald who co-authored a study published in the Journal of Health Economics in 2008 on the impacts of Nobel Prizes, mentioned that changes in the minds of Nobel laureates due to the value of the prestige (not money) of the Prize made them live longer than their colleagues who were also nominated for the Prize (1901 to 1950) but never won the Nobel.
And, there is an interesting article in a recent issue of the journal of the Association for Psychological Science in which June Gruber of Yale University says: “...The strongest predictor of happiness is not money, or external recognition through success or fame. It is having meaningful social relationships.” It is a psychological factor.
As Rita Davenport once said:
“MONEY IS NOT EVERYTHING, BUT IT RANKS UP THERE WITH OXYGEN.”
Some, however, think that money is everything, thinking that they can, after all, buy oxygen also! The world is now full of people, living and working under the animalistic doctrine and culture of ‘Work – Consume – Die’, dressed in subtle and gross deceptions, for whom earning by hook or by crook is the ‘be-all and end-all. Two notorious persons were geniuses of making big money through crooked means -- Harshad Mehta and Abdul Khim Telgi. But a philosophy evolved by their life stories -- one of them told an investigating official, on way to jail, "Money is very bad, Sir, it makes a man as well as destroys him." Telgi eked out a living by selling vegetables on trains. Later he made Rs. 30,000 crore through his 'stamp paper scam' and finally landed in jail burdened also with AIDS, meningitis and diabetes ! Mehta also started as a small timer, born in a poor family. He manipulated 'share market' and landed in a scam of Rs. 6,000 crore. He met a premature death while in jail. Now (2018), we are waiting to see what happens to the two top-notch diamond merchants, Nirav Modi and Mehul Choksi, accused of defrauding he Punjab National Bank (PNB) of over Rs. 13,500 crore.
“Thinking big” is good as far as it goes with “aiming at high”
but not “thinking high of oneself.”
- Prof. V. Prafulla
It has become too cliché to say “THINK BIG.” Looking at the mental wrecks who “thought big” and failed to make it, I feel that I am lucky by “thinking small.” By setting the bar too high for them and their children, many parents had not only become mental wrecks but made their children too vulnerable to psychological disorders. We are like prepaid cards with limited value. As we are only temporary in this world, don’t go on struggling to build up too many assets. Don’t live a dreary round of working, eating and trying to sleep in your short span of life. Don’t live seriously, enjoy life as it comes. Happiness and relaxation should come spontaneously. People who have a tight ‘time-table-schedule’ for happiness may end up worse off than when they started. And some who, follow text book tips for relaxation and unwinding by having perfunctorily programmed holidays may well end up in utter stress. Live a balanced life. We are people, not programmed machines. Happiness is a state of mind – it is within us, only we have to discover, feel and enjoy – we need not become “big and rich” to be happy. Be contented and enjoy what you have. After all, time and circumstances may change.
When a bird is alive, it eats ants; when it is dead, the ants eat the bird ! We were born from nothingness and shall shortly pass unto the same.
“Richness is not having lots of money;
It is the feeling that one has enough of it;
Contentment is what makes one really rich .--- T. Rama Prasad
PASSION, MONEY and HAPPINESS
This is an excerpt from my blog article titled “MY LOVE STORY” which is in the link below : https://drtramaprasad.blogspot.com/2017/04/my-love-story-good-old-days_30.html
We ( I & Rajyalakshmi ) have a passion for charity (‘daanam & dharmam’’), gardening and writing. Helping the needy infuses a positive energy into us. Service to humanity is service to god. NATURE IS OUR GOD. Even in my room in Andhra Medical College Men’s Hostel, I used to grow ‘chains’ of' ‘money plants’ from water bottles hung to the window frame in those days (1960s). She studied BOTANY in the university. I studied in gardens. Go to my article titled "Trees and Plants" on my blog. https://drtramaprasad.blogspot.com/2017/04/trees-and-plants_29.html
We always had lots of 'money plants' -- but not lots of money! Read my blog article titled"Richness and Happiness" -- https://drtramaprasad.blogspot.com/2017/04/richness-and-happiness_28.html . We spend more than what we can afford on charity and plants. We are not rich. People think that we are rich, going by our attire and lifestyle, but our bank balance had always been a meagre amount. 'Happiness balance' had always been high though. The reason for this desirable equation is my "PAY WHAT YOU CAN Clinic" -- read about it -- https://drtramaprasad.blogspot.com/2017/04/what-you-can-clinic_30.html . In this clinic, the patient has the choice to pay whatever she / he can. No fixed fee.
The concept of this type of clinic dawned on me about 70 years ago when my schoolmate 'GORU' didn't turn up after a summer vacation. She died of a disease due to lack of money for treatment. That motivated me to let people pay what they can.
This system didn't make any sense to many doctors. Even my kith and kin didn't find any sense in it. None stepped into my shoes. The charitable activity only attracted a derogatory smile, as I may have been viewed as a fool or a philosopher devoid of any common sense. I tell you from my long experience that the Income from such a clinic would be sufficient for a doctor's need, but not greed.
In our lifetime, we found that our happiness had been inversely proportional to affluence. The younger generation seems to be less happy as they tend to chase endlessly the mirage of affluence. The very young are even 'tortured' by parents and teachers to get high marks in examinations to pave their way to affluence in future. The young minds are tuned to be obsessed with wealth. Money may ensure some sort of comforts, security and some insurance against some odds, but not necessarily happiness.
‘Money is not everything in life’. People are tired of such platitudes and sermons, and find sense in what Warren Buffett said (see the quote below). That’s because money is a common denominator for most of the things. If we want to help someone or ourselves, mostly, money is needed though ‘rich in money’ doesn’t mean ‘rich in charity’. Mostly, people come to us to take, not to give. We are not kings, nor saints.
Some money is needed for a comfortable living, educating children or helping others (charity). And we must work to earn that money using our available brain power, skill power and / or material power, through fair means. My father didn’t have the money to educate me further. Could I have been at a higher professional level, if he had the money ? No regrets.
Due to lack of money, we couldn’t buy the radiogram without selling the only gold chain that she had (my half girlfriend has a passion for music), had to wait for four years to get married, couldn’t celebrate our marriage, couldn’t get educated further, couldn’t help our kith and kin or others to the extent we wanted to, and couldn’t have a smooth sailing in life. But no regrets, as we became good navigators (read the quote at the beginning of my article titled “MY LOVE STORY” -- ’A smooth sea never made a skilful mariner; The path to pleasure is paved with thorns’) and sailed through the very rough sea very happily. That’s the thrill of HAPPINESS which a king can’t get.
“Richness is not having lots of money. It is the feeling that one has enough of it.
Contentment is what makes one really rich.” -- T. Rama Prasad
“Money is not everything. But make sure you earn a lot before speaking such nonsense.” -- Warren Buffett
My doctor father also didn't earn much money, partly because he kept “business tricks in medical practice” at a distance. He used to send me Rs.100 per month by ‘postal money order' while I was studying MBBS (an amount which may not be sufficient to have a good breakfast today !). Postman used to come to the hostel and deliver the money. Bank services were not well-developed; credit cards, debit cards and online transactions were not even in the dreams. After paying the ‘hostel mess bill’, I used to lavish a little of the extra money for my hobby of photography. The Yashika roll film camera (no digital cameras in those days; and mostly ‘Black & White’ pictures) of one of my classmates (V.L.N. Reddy who settled in UK ) used to be with me always.
Though we had not been rich, we helped a lot of people in many ways, albeit in a small way, without publicity. And we loved them more than we loved each other. The happiness we derived from this is the ultimate satisfaction in our lives.
Nevertheless, we have divergent opinions on various matters. We argue. We fight. We are often not on the same platform. We are like parallel rails -- together, but apart !!! Like richness and happiness !!!
AKBAR: “Tell me one sentence that makes a happy person sad and a sad person happy."
BIRBAL: “This moment is not permanent in life !”
And here is a joke about a happy couple:
“How come they are so happy ?”
“ HE does what SHE likes
SHE does what SHE likes !”
For more on this topic, read under the heading “FOOL or PHILOSOPHER” on this blog.
THIS IS AN ABRIDGED TEXT OF MY 'SCRIBBLING'. THE FULL TEXT WILL BE POSTED LATER. -- T. Rama Prasad |
Absolutely true
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely true
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