MOTHER-IN-LAW's SEAT or Daughter-in-law’s Seat ?
ONE-UPMANSHIP ( ‘ONE-UPWOMANSHIP’ ! )
The plant in the photo is a thorny cactus called Echinocactus grusonii which is originally from Mexico. It is now grown all over the world for its beautiful ball-like shape with rows of yellow or white sharp spines (thorns) all over. It may grow up to 3 feet in height and live up to 30 years. It is also known as 'Golden Ball Cactus', 'Golden Barrel Cactus' and, also amusingly as, 'Mother-in-law's Seat' or 'Mother-in-law's Cushion'.
Perhaps, the daughters-in-law of the bygone era who faced the terror of the proverbial ‘terrorist’ mother-in-law might have secretly wished their mothers-in-law to be seated on this thorny cactus plant as a revenge ! Poor little things filled with creepy feelings in their hostile homes. Facing the litany of barbs and jibes. What else can they wish in those blissful days of mothers-in-law !
Times seem to have changed. Reversal of the roles. One mother-in-law, Mrs. Maadhavi, wished that this cactus be renamed as "Daughter-in-law's Seat." The incessant and impertinent outbursts of her daughter-in-law, Mrs. Paavi, prompted her to suggest this. The high decibel bossism caused quite a disquiet in her hitherto tranquil home. The touchy and temperamental Paavi has come to rule the roost with a motor mouth. Maadhavi had a reasonably stress-free and happy life prior to the arrival of the truculent Paavi. Peace was replaced by volcanic outbursts. She lamented, much to her chagrin, that she had to face the overriding 'one-upmanship' behaviour of the imperious, impudent, and motor-mouthed Paavi who made her feel that her home was no more hers. She felt that the new girl stepped in with the impression that everything is wrong at the new home and that she had to correct everything. The paranoid mindset of the egoistic green horn thrown her off kilter.
Maadhavi couldn’t have the ‘luxury’ of having even one more light switched on in her home as it would promptly be switched off by her new ‘boss’, muttering a comment for lack of sense of economy. Diplomacy of language and behaviour were given a go by. Maadhavi, a former professor of Economics, had to take lessons on economics, food wastage and proper utilisation of manpower from the modern economist with wayward emotions ! And her TV was switched off while she was watching, with a grumble that the sound was disturbingly high which reeks of arrogance, utter lack of manners and a contrast with the soft and humble nature of Maadhavi. Politeness and humbleness took back seat while ego and self-centredness came to the fore. And, curiously, there were interspersing spells of exhibition of extreme concern and affection -- perhaps, a kind of bipolarity. However, the unwarranted caustic comments stung and wounded Maadhavi miserably. Sick she had become due to the stress, and silently wept on several occasions.
Endowed with Hitler’s ‘hard power’ rather than daughter-in-law’s ‘soft power’, Paavi enjoyed in rolling out instructions rather than being receptive to suggestions, and in being quick and eager to argue and fight. In the good old days, mothers-in-law used to teach their daughters-in-law about civic sense, manners, culture, diplomacy of language and behaviour, societal customs, tenets, traditions, etc. Paavi seemed to think that there's nothing to learn from the old school and the old fossils.
And the father-in-law, Saneeswaran, was given his due of platitudes and sermons on domestic harmony and human relationships. Ironically, he was a professor of Humanities ! Being equally ill-tempered and touchy, he also erupted like a volcano often to give it back to the fussy kid. The septuagenarians were even prompted to give up their old traditional food items and fall in line for fancy fads. The elderly couple tolerated the sly manipulative dictator to the possible extent. Incorrigibly arrogant / abysmally self-centred / innocently childish ??? The confusion drove the in-laws into a ‘Gated Senior Citizens Home’ (read about these homes on this blog under the heading ‘You Are Not Old’ -- click on: https://drtramaprasad.blogspot.com/2017/07/you-are-not-old.html ).
As in all stories, they lived happily ever after !
Here is an amusing gag about the 'New Generation Indian Daughter-in-law'. May be a provocative parody of sorts ! Read on and enjoy.
Maadhavi couldn’t have the ‘luxury’ of having even one more light switched on in her home as it would promptly be switched off by her new ‘boss’, muttering a comment for lack of sense of economy. Diplomacy of language and behaviour were given a go by. Maadhavi, a former professor of Economics, had to take lessons on economics, food wastage and proper utilisation of manpower from the modern economist with wayward emotions ! And her TV was switched off while she was watching, with a grumble that the sound was disturbingly high which reeks of arrogance, utter lack of manners and a contrast with the soft and humble nature of Maadhavi. Politeness and humbleness took back seat while ego and self-centredness came to the fore. And, curiously, there were interspersing spells of exhibition of extreme concern and affection -- perhaps, a kind of bipolarity. However, the unwarranted caustic comments stung and wounded Maadhavi miserably. Sick she had become due to the stress, and silently wept on several occasions.
And the father-in-law, Saneeswaran, was given his due of platitudes and sermons on domestic harmony and human relationships. Ironically, he was a professor of Humanities ! Being equally ill-tempered and touchy, he also erupted like a volcano often to give it back to the fussy kid. The septuagenarians were even prompted to give up their old traditional food items and fall in line for fancy fads. The elderly couple tolerated the sly manipulative dictator to the possible extent. Incorrigibly arrogant / abysmally self-centred / innocently childish ??? The confusion drove the in-laws into a ‘Gated Senior Citizens Home’ (read about these homes on this blog under the heading ‘You Are Not Old’ -- click on: https://drtramaprasad.blogspot.com/2017/07/you-are-not-old.html ).
As in all stories, they lived happily ever after !
Here is an amusing gag about the 'New Generation Indian Daughter-in-law'. May be a provocative parody of sorts ! Read on and enjoy.
... It is a myth that the family members can relax a little more when a son gets married and a new daughter-in-law arrives.
The scenario in this modern age is as visualised below:
The new wife (progressive, modern, empowered and assertive Indian woman of today) is being welcomed at the husband's home.
The motor-mouthed novice delivered the following maiden discourse with an air of conceit:
"My dear family members, I thank you all for welcoming me to MY new home and YOUR family. At the outset, I would like to make it very clear to you all that I have a deep respect for you all, and that I don't want to interfere with your life style. MY being here doesn’t mean that I would want to change your way of life and your routine activities. No, I will never do that, never in a million years."
"What do you mean my child?," asked the father-in-law.
"What I mean is this (looking at her 'in-laws') -- I don't want to take away your pleasure of housekeeping. Continue to keep MY house clean and tidy. Those who used to serve the food would continue to serve, and those who wash the dishes must continue washing them. Those who used to do the laundry work must continue doing it. Those who were cooking should not stop attending to kitchen work, and those who used to water the plants would hold the responsibility of growing vegetables."
"And what are you here for MAHARANI ?" enquired the traditional Indian mother-in-law.
"AS FOR ME, I AM HERE JUST TO MANAGE THIS HOUSE, RECTIFY ALL THE DEFECTS, DO SHOPPING, ENTERTAIN YOUR SON and CONTROL EVERYTHING, INCLUDING YOUR SON'S BRAIN AND HIS VOICE BOX !! As I am in the driver’s seat, you need not worry about anything. I shall lead you all in the right direction. And, it would be politically correct if you all cooperate to run MY HOUSE smoothly.”
The mother-in-law’s jaw dropped !
"And one more important thing. I created a WhatsApp group with all the members of the family as participants under the group's title "Monthly bills". My first post reads like this: "Kindly send all the purchases you make . Cash bill , Card payment details , Any petty cash Spent even Rs 1 also 😃 Prakash will enter it in the expenses . It will help us to set our accounts right. Kindly Co operate."
Now, it's the father-in-law's turn to drop his jaw !
“Small children disturb your sleep; Big children your life.”
-- Yiddish proverb
Controlling the voice box !!!
Times have changed: Mother-in-law HUMBLE; Daughter-in-law HORRIBLE
In radiology, this expression is used to describe lesions that enhance early during the arterial phase and remain opacified well after the venous phase. The sign is jokingly named after the uncanny ability of mothers-in-law to arrive early and stay late. Such behaviour matches the classic angiographic enhancement pattern of meningiomas (brain tumours).
"Mother-in-law's tongue"
There is a plant by name 'Mother-in-law's tongue'. Its botanical name is 'Sansevieria trifasciata'. It is also called 'Saint George's Sword' and 'Viper's Bowstring Hemp. The admonitions of a mother-in-law come as a tongue of flame flashed from the gun. The shape of the leaves of this plant are like a big sharp tongue. That's why it is jocularly named as 'mother-in-law's tongue !
There is a plant by name 'Mother-in-law's tongue'. Its botanical name is 'Sansevieria trifasciata'. It is also called 'Saint George's Sword' and 'Viper's Bowstring Hemp. The admonitions of a mother-in-law come as a tongue of flame flashed from the gun. The shape of the leaves of this plant are like a big sharp tongue. That's why it is jocularly named as 'mother-in-law's tongue !
SCRIBBLER's NOTE :
All that's written above is not FICTION, 90% REAL. In fact, the WhatsApp text printed above was copied and pasted from a post received on December 9, 2023. On that day, a WhatsApp group of six participants was created, and that's the first post by the Admin. Five of them are family members living under the same roof, including a 'plus 2' student. The sixth one, Prakash, is a staff member doing accounting work in the Admin's office.
That's the height of maturity, wisdom and sanity to "set right accounts on household expenditure" of a small joint family of five people -- a kind of bureaucracy that can be emulated by the Finance Minister of India (a nation of a 'disjointed' joint family) to take the country to a 'FIVE TRILLION DOLLAR ECONOMY' by 2025.
Yes, India is developed to manage finance and accounting digitally even for 'one rupee' expenditure on peanuts or flowers. This case is cite-worthy for professors in the Harvard School of Management.
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